Mar 20, 2007

Here Here, I Hold the Conch...Currently



Established rules of the mixtape club:

1) 'Mixtape' will be used heretofore as a single word, not two words with a hyphen.
2) The word 'mixtape' will refer to compact discs containing musical arrangements, spoken word, or whatever the creator deems necessary for the overall zeitgeist of the mixtape in creation.
3) Members, when designated, will be responsible to create and distribute a mixtape to every other member of the guild.
4) Members will offer their candid comentary on the audio files received, and they will offer said commentary in the comments section of this Web Log, or "Blog," or even "Weog."
5) Members will maintain the utmost rigor and punctuality with respect to mixtape distribution as to encourage rewards for fellow guild members.
6) Members will refrain from including Sufjan Stevens on their mixtapes, as he is not pleasing to the ear.
7) Rules are subject to change through democratic processes.

Sky me, boyeeee!

45 comments:

Gillz said...

HAHAHA!! Okay, I'm in. And no Sufjan Stevens, check check. But TLC's "Don't Go Chasing Waterfalls" is fine, right? Because I seem to remember KFLO used to play that every hour on the hour or something like that...

Chaucer Arafat said...

The former sins of Steamboat Garmon will not be visited upon my head or the heads of my children.

Nice to have Gillz.

Many welcomes.

Enigma-Machinist said...

I am on board.
But unfortunately, my costume is more of the 20th Century type, because I bought it at a Detroit downtown costume shop. They told me it was 'authentic'.

If TLC's "Don't go chasing waterfalls" is ok, I might need to counterattack that with Chumbawamba "Tubthumper".

ibid said...

I am pleased to be amongst such distinguished members, but mostly it pleases me to be in a guild that has a rule that openly disdains the captain twee Sufjan. If for no other reason, I had to join, and the promise of music is but a bonus.

Chaucer Arafat said...

Troyzer on board. Yessir. It won't be too long now before we begin. I am waiting for the information from a few stragglers.

I really hate Sufjan, sincerely. But I know a lot of folks enjoy him and mock me for loving Toto and Captain Beefheart. I could never truly tell someone to not include Sufjan on their mixes (as it is a matter of taste), but I hope they aren't offended when i skip over it.

Enigma-Machinist said...

Just to spite. Every mix I make will be glorified with the sounds of Sufjan.

no...I lied.
I can't. I just can't.

Gillz said...

Last word on Sufjan from me:

You know, I admit I have three Sufjan tracks on my computer, sent to me via email by a former student of mine, and while I've never been too interested in finding more Sufjan, you have to give some kudos or at least a slight, backhanded, half-salute to a man who writes a love ballad about a clown that rapes and kills little boys. I'm not saying I'm a fan of it, I'm just saying.....John Wayne Gacy, Jr. is quite the elephant to put in an album about Illinois full of falsetto and piano solos instead of the acid bath of heavy metal that sex-offender songs would normally abide. I'm just saying. I'm not putting him on a mix, but I will give the man a head nod.

Chaucer Arafat said...

oh yeah, for sure Em. I am guilty of still having a Sufjan album or two on the pod, but I cringe everytime a song comes on and remind myself to erase later..which is promptly forgotten.

He has talent, absolutely, it is just the repetitive, rampantly twee-schtick that stirs ma grits.

I have rarely found a piece of music criticism (aside from Christgau's Eagles hatred) to so identically mimic my own discovery and subsequent misgivings as this: A Case Against Sufjan

So well said. I loved Sufjan when I first heard him on a CMJ Compilation some years back. But now, the Hanna-Barbera cutesyness has grown insufferable.

Maybe I am just jealous.

Enigma-Machinist said...

I have all of his albums and I actually do love Mr. S. Stevens, but I have keep from adding him to any playlists. I consider him a easy playlist addition.

I mentioned this to Grifter, but I think I should mention a possible rule here:
Songs that are used in soundtracks from movies released in the past 20 years should be excluded.
Reason being, I would hate to recieve the Garden State soundtrack all over again. If someone adds Frou Frou's Let Go, I think I might snap.

teacher of fruit said...

Check Check? I'm Em's friend. And I'll admit that I was afraid to join something that on the surface sounded so pretentious, but I’ve already seen mention to Toto and Cpt. Beefheart—and I think I’ll be fine. I know I’m new, and I know I should have to earn a voice, but, if I could, I would like to recommend a friend of mine. At one time I was a complete music snob, but when I dropped that (I’m still seeing a 12 step program to help me fill the void) my good friend/ex-girlfriend picked up where I left off. She’s a fan of all hip and unhip music (I’m certain she has both rare Mogwai tracks and the soundtrack to Xanadu hidden in her collection). She makes me mixetapes now that last me months at a time. If no one objects, I’d like to invite her. Thanks all.

Chaucer Arafat said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Shamus said...

I wish that my mix tape could just be the soundtrack from the original Transformers movie. Or Mousercise.

Gillz said...

Haha, Mousercize. I still remember the bug-a-boo hand motions from first grade p.e. Well, if you get to do Mousercize, I get to do Heffalumps and Woozles on MY mixtape then.

No, no, I'm kidding gang. Don't kick me out yet. I'll be very sparing with my diznee traks, I proooomise. One song sung by Hayley Mills for every Toto song I receive. Square?

Enigma-Machinist said...

I think I need to find that track of Roseanne Barr singing the national anthem.

Chaucer Arafat said...

Transformers the Movie included Wierd Al's "Dare To Be Stupid"...Al did Devo better than Devo.

Could anyone really be against that?

Emily: crazy how our minds work. I was thinking of the scariest songs ever written, and I thought "huffalumps and woozles is going on my first mix". just...uncanny.

Inclusion of Roseanne would open a whole can of-worm ass. I can't wait to get jivin'.

Enigma-Machinist said...

So Grift, what do you have lined up for your first release? Is it all a SEW-PRiZE?

Roseanne makes my ears bleed.

Shamus said...

That's funny that you were thinking of the "scariest songs ever" because I was actually thinking of the "scariest stalker songs".

Cosmic? Maybe. Though Val and I did meet the wierdest lady last week who freaked out over vegetable dip.

"Is that Kraft French Onion dip? Oh my gosh, I use that dip, too! That's my dip!"

Most definitely cosmic.

Oh, and Bug-a-boo is a song that haunts me to this day.

Gillz said...

James, I hope you're planning to include the Charles-in-Charge theme song to your stalker cd..."Charles in Charge of our days and our nights, our wrongs and our rights, our grocery lists and our dental plans, our firstborn sons and our redemptions from sin, and I sing: I want! I want Charles in Charge of me....."

Another track from Joe's scariest songlist: Tom Waits "Black Wings" Am I right or am I right or am I right. And I would maybe add The Doors "Riders on the Storm," The Cure "Lullabye" and the song Bowie sings to Jennifer Connelly from inside the snow globe.

Shamus said...

Man, I have such a weakness for Labyrinth! I might actually know the words to that snow globe song. But let's just say for cool's sake I don't.

Joe, good call on the "Dare to Be Stupid." Uncanny Devo.

"Every Breath You Take" is my all time creepiest stalker song.

Chaucer Arafat said...

Oh Gillililliland. Too easy for you.

Although Waits's vaudeville act doesn't scare like it did a while back.

A song with stalker appeal? "School" by Supertramp, for some reason, used to unnerve me in that regard.

We need to get this off the ground. We will do so by the end of the week. Or I will die a cowards death.

Captain Admiral said...

No soundtrack songs from the last twenty years? Crap. I was getting ready to sneak some Kenny Loggins in there. And, just to prove that I'm old, my prom song (uh, 1988, sheesh) was the Righteous Bros. "I've had the time of my life" from the Dirty Dancing soundtrack. No kidding. And San Dimas High School Football Rules!

Enigma-Machinist said...

Ok, 20 years is a bit extreme. But I think my point was made with any Frou Frou or anything from a Wes Anderson film, or anything from a Quinton Tarrintino film, or such. I think their soundtrack work is EXCELLENT. Taking from their soundtracks, to me, is lame. Do what you will, but I will definately call you out on it! I guess I am pretty nazi about that rule.

isopraxis said...

The single request of a north-slope frostback:

I humbly ask my compadres and compatriots in this project to try to keep within the wide horizons of aesthetic goodness. I'm not looking to join up in a collective exercise of subjecting other people to music that has no merit other than its kitschy ugliness. I recognise that a bit of camp is nice once-in-a-while, like when a jump-shot in billiards is well played. But let us recognise that moves like this are best used sparingly.

I beseech that we select our musics according to the better angels of our natures. I request that collectively we refrain as much as possible from unfunny musical jokes such as Kenny Loggins, Cheap Trick, Weird Al, Milli Vanilli and Pfhil Collins.

**toggles fnord switch to off**

Chaucer Arafat said...

Isopraxis:

I think you hit upon an ideal concept, but I have a concern. That terrain is a subjective ride. People give me shit for loving prog, which is arguably befouled with such kitschy ugliness. But on a visceral level (and mainly the instrumentation)it moves me--not meaning to sound ridiculous or mawkish. Also, for example, there are early Cheap Trick tracks that I really think have stamina, and that I might have included on a mixtape with straightfaced sincerity.

But damn if you aren't right...I guess what I will say, for myself, is this: I will not include songs that would deliberately (or, I should say, knowingly) make the kitsch more insufferable for anyone. I might include tracks to inspire bewilderment, exasperation, indignation, or measured repulsion--but never kitsch.

I really like a lot of music that I know is hideous.

I can fully understand your concern, especially after the Z man's, Clamato's and my "Battle of Dentist Office Music"; I just hope that what I sincerely love isn't something that someone severely hates, though it will be unavoidable at times.

I guess another sterling example of this could be the last mixtape club I was in, where everyone thought it was so damn cool to include The Shaggs on their mixes. It was the most unfunniest of musical jokes, even if they were Zappa's favorite.

Isopraxis, my brother, I am beaming that you are going to make mixes. It is a deep well you drink from.

teacher of fruit said...

True dat (I love cheap trick--and in the most sincere non-ironic kind of way. Which I know isn’t winning any hip contests, but hell, they rock.)

Talking of creepy great songs? Leadbelly’s “Where did you sleep last night?” Gene Autry’s “Atlanta Bound” (which will certainly be on my first mix) and Tom Waits, (I do love “black wings”) but his album “Real Gone” (which I know is a late album and people often hoist prejudice for that with him) has half a dozen truly beautifully/creepy songs including “Don’t go into that Barn,” “Dead and Lovely” and last, but not least “Circus”—They drink Pruno (rotten ketchup) in this song. So damn cool. I’m very excited about all this.

Chaucer Arafat said...

Teacher: yessir! the whole leadbelly staple. and lets not get started on lightnin' hopkins. oh yes: make sure your invitee is aware that time is a wastin'.

All: I think we will have 13 members, which is cool. So 3 groups of 3 and 1 group of 4.

Gillz said...

Emily wants to say she is antzy to begin.

And I'd also just like pats on my back for mostly completing my thesis this week. Well, you don't HAVE to congratulate me, I just sort of like saying I'm almost done. I'm almost done. And I want to be sent music soon. This is all. And I will refrain from including Phil Collins on my mixes although I must say I have had some sacred moments singing "Another Day in Paradise" with my sister during Thanksgiving Dinner. But seriously, I'll be mature about my contributions.

teacher of fruit said...

Congrats Em! That's fantastic! I'd love to read stuff if you want to share (or if you need feedback, although my poetry knowledge is totally wack).

Gillz said...

Haha!! Nice profile pic, Russ. You've slimmed up some, eh? Yeah, I might actually send some stuff your way if you don't mind...a lot of what I have is incredibly rough...just getting things done for the sake of getting them done. Oh, I looked over your "horseshit" and didn't find any of the boring parts you mentioned. So thanks for the read. Cheers.

Gillz said...

Also, has Zollinger showed up yet? I'd like to give my regards to the Taco Prince soon. It's been a long time since I've had the pleasure of cartwheels outside my window well or story exchanges about Harry Potter or squirrels that eat ice cream with that old Garfunkel doppleganger. Is he here and I just don't see him?

Chaucer Arafat said...

Way to go Emily. That must feel excellent. You make us all proud..

Hey, on Matty Z: he has expressed his excitement to me and re-requested the link to join, but I haven't seen him yet. Z's M.O. is to be more than fashionably late. When he does show, it will probably be under the name "simon"

john One forty said...

Kiss me once, Kiss me twice, come on pretty baby kiss me deadly...

Chaucer Arafat said...

hee hee.



hee.



heee.


ohhh....BAALoons...

john One forty said...

Hey, it ain't no big thing...

Chaucer Arafat said...

hey, john one forty...you need to follow the link in your email to become a bonafide member of the guild. we need your name, all shiny like, up on this blog in the "comitatus" section.

who holds back the electric car?
who made steve gutenberg, a star?
We DO..WEE DO!

john One forty said...

Nothin' to eat and no TV
Lookin' in the mirror don't get it for me
Uh, huh
It ain't no big thing

Uh, I think I deleted the link, sorry All I have to offer now in Lita Ford... Resend the invite?

Chaucer Arafat said...

okay, but this is the last of 6 times..

Chaucer Arafat said...

Gillz said: Nice profile pic, Russ. You've slimmed up some, eh?

could it be the amyotrophic lateral sclerosis?

Gillz said...

Aha.......yes. Yes, from henceforth, I will desist from making jabs at Stephen Hawking's degenerative diseases. *checks eye-glass prescrip, scuttles away*

John Wan 4t said...

So, uh, does this mean I have to leave all those Ratt t t singles off my mix tape? And Jonny... Invisible Touch is a kick ass album!

More correct Ratt t t t t single...

Chaucer Arafat said...

no bands with superfluous letters!

Ratt, Color Me Badd, Oasis (okay..so the last band didn't fit the rule)


Jokes. It is all fair game.

And I found THIS entry interesting..some of you might appreciate it.

Enigma-Machinist said...

I never föund the metal umlaut sö fastinating üntil nöw! Thanks!

teacher of fruit said...

Chaucer, that is the very reason I'll never outlaw wikipedia from my classes. Long live Hüsker Dü. (By the way, I meant no disrespect by picking the master of worm holes and other cool cool sci-fi ideas, as my picture--I think it's a handsome picture.

teacher of fruit said...

I’m all about the random machine, but if I do get picked to go first, expect Olivia Newton John, Dwight Yoakam, Yes, Gary Gliter, Journey, Merle Haggard and Justin Timberlake on my mix. And I’ll blame it all on not knowing better because I’m a semi-outside member (all of the above I love with my tongue barely past my molars.)—I guess this is more of a threat to the random machine than a promise to all of you.

Chaucer Arafat said...

Dwight Yoakam, Merle and Yes on one mixtape?

If we were only so lucky. Sincerely.